The cost of an avoided conversation
70% of employees avoid certain difficult conversations. That silence has a cost, in time as well as in trust.
We all have a conversation we keep putting off: feedback to give, a disagreement to raise, a decision to announce. We tell ourselves it can wait. The research says otherwise: these silences are costly, in time as well as in trust.
Avoidance is the rule, not the exception
This is nothing new. As early as 2009, the authors of Crucial Conversations found that more than 70% of employees did not speak up with their colleagues, managers or teams. The two most common reasons: fear of retaliation and the feeling that “it won't make any difference”.
A cost in time…
… and in trust
Lost time is only the visible part. An avoided conversation lets the problem settle in, feeds misunderstandings and wears down the relationship. According to Crucial Learning, 43% of respondents say they spend two weeks or more ruminating over an unresolved problem, and one employee in three believes that staying silent at the wrong moment cost their organisation at least $25,000.
Why we avoid
Rarely for lack of goodwill. We avoid because we fear the other person's reaction, because we're afraid of damaging the relationship, or simply because we don't know how to go about it. Yet managers are often expected to get right, first time, conversations they have never been able to prepare for.
A difficult conversation should be prepared like an important speech: you rehearse it before it counts.
What changes the game: repetition
The good news is that confidence can be built. Practising in a setting with no real stakes, trying out a phrasing, seeing how the other person reacts, starting again: that's what turns a known method into a reflex. It's the whole idea behind Practicio.